What you see is me wearing cute, spring dresses to work.
What you don’t see is me trying on all of my dress pants to find that none of them fit and knowing there is truly no time for me to do anything about it right now.
What you see is a precious, curly-headed two-year old who is as sharp as a tack.
What you don’t see is her throwing another tantrum or me losing my patience with her for failing to remember her potty again! You don’t see my sadness when she says, “Mommy, I want to hold you!” and I can’t hold her because one of her brothers is screaming.
What you see are twin boys who are as cute as can be and growing every day!
What you don’t see is me falling asleep as I’m feeding one of them in the middle of the night. And me truly praying for the day when they will both sleep all night! You don’t see my worry that they don’t know how much I love and care for them.
What you see is an organized household.
What you don’t see is the tremendous help I get from my husband, my mom and dad, my mother and father-in-law, and other family members. You also don’t see the things I have to “let go”.
What you see is a mom and a wife who “has it all together”.
What you don’t see are the tears of worry and stress. You don’t hear the countless pep talks I give myself and others give me. You don’t see the offense I run to stay one step ahead of the next dilemma, problem or issue. You don’t (yet) see the gray hairs that have started sprouting on my crown.
If you look really closely at my life and my family, you will see a woman (who still can’t believe she’s old enough to be married and have three children) trying her VERY best day in and day out to be a high-quality person, wife, mom and friend. If you listen really closely, you will hear me asking God multiple times a day to bless me in those endeavors.
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ReplyDeleteHang in there! You are doing a great job! Really you are! What you feel like life should look like may not be the acutal 'real life' picture, but God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, above ALL we could ever ask or think! You're doing great!
ReplyDeleteWell said, my sweet friend, well said. One moment at a time is the best anyone can do, and I think you're doing it beautifully!
ReplyDeleteWhat's so beautiful about you is that even in those moments of complete desperation, you turn it into something good, even if you don't think it's good at the time. "This too shall pass" and one day all three of those sweet babies will be big enough to let Mamma sleep a little longer, and be herself again. And when that time comes and Richard and I are having our babies, I will be the one calling you with tears in my voice, needing a pep talk! :) I love you, my dear friend! And I will pray fervently for a refreshing peace to overwhelm you (and for a few more minutes/hours of sleep in the night)!
ReplyDeleteOh, this made me cry, Corrie. It hits home.
ReplyDeleteI think no matter what outfit you're wearing, no matter how loud Clara's screams are, no matter how many inches of dust are gathering on your furniture...you are an incredible mom. You have an amazing heart, my friend. And THAT is what it's all about.
(By the way, my word verification for this comment is "suffor." Coincidence? Probably not. =) )
Your honesty is refreshing. Much love from another "What You Don't See Mom."
ReplyDeleteamen sista! i couldn't have said it better myself! of course, i do not have twins, but i find myself feeling the same way. i guess its all part of being a mom!!!!!
ReplyDeleteWhat I see is an amazing woman whose passion is in being a Godly wife, mom, daughter, friend. I also see this amazing woman who will never be satisfied that she has done enough. You amaze me and I am so very proud of you. Your family is blessed by you every day. I love you!
ReplyDeleteWow, Corrie! Thanks for sharing these thoughts and emotions. You are doing such a great job!
ReplyDeleteI left a very appropriate blog award for you at my blog! Have a great day!
ReplyDeleteYour children are blessed to call you mother, your husband is blessed to call you wife, your family is blessed to call you daughter, sister, cousin, aunt, niece, granddaughter. I am blessed to call you friend.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am grateful we journey this life of "What You Don't See" days together. Soon, so soon, they will end and we'll only wish we still had them.
Love you and see you soon!